


a new beginning

by LiveLaughLovex



Category: Scandal (TV)
Genre: F/M, Introspection, Post-Canon, Post-Season/Series 05, Starting Over, and i will not ever apologize for that, i continue to live in a world where nothing beyond s5 ever happened
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-27
Updated: 2020-12-27
Packaged: 2021-03-11 03:08:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 800
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28368171
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LiveLaughLovex/pseuds/LiveLaughLovex
Summary: He'd loved her, completely, and it wasn't that she hadn't felt the same. It was that she'd never taken the time to reciprocate - to love him as he'd always loved her.It really was no wonder he’d resigned from his vice-presidential post the second Mellie’s First 100 Days were over, nor was it a surprise he’d left D.C. – and, most likely, North America – as soon as he had left that letter of resignation on the Resolute desk.
Relationships: Jake Ballard/Olivia Pope
Comments: 1
Kudos: 3





	a new beginning

Sometimes, Olivia had to remind herself that she chose this.

She chose to leave the island and return to D.C., even when Jake hadn’t wanted to. She’d chosen to be with Fitz, even after Jake nearly sacrificed himself for her, even after he’d told her he loved her. She’d made the decision to betray him, again and again, until he’d come to expect it from her. She’d broken his heart, over and over and over again, until he’d finally reached a point where he wasn’t as willing to trust her with it. And when he’d asked her, in that dressing room, if she’d run away with him – if she’d help him escape his ghosts whilst also managing to outrun hers – well. She’d stopped short of coming out and calling him an idiot, at the very least. She certainly hadn’t made any secret of the fact that she saw him as one, though.

He’d wanted to follow his heart, that day. He’d been trying to tell her she was his heart. And all she’d done was repeat the words of her father – words she’d heard, over and over again, so much that she had come to despite those words as much as she did the man who uttered them – using them to call herself extraordinary, to tell him she couldn’t ever be the person he wanted her to be, that she didn’t want to be that person.

In all that time, she’d never stopped to consider that perhaps Jake wasn’t the one asking her to change. Perhaps that pressure came from within. Jake loved her. He’d always loved her, had never once made a secret of that. And he was smart, a lot smarter than most people gave him credit for. He wouldn’t fall in love with a stranger. He knew exactly who she was, and he adored her anyway, openly and completely.

Jake hadn’t ever struggled to provide her with unconditional love. She was the one who’d struggled all along, both when it came to accepting it and when it came to reciprocating it.

It really wasn't any wonder he’d resigned from his vice-presidential post the second Mellie’s First 100 Days were over, nor was it a surprise he’d left D.C. – and, most likely, North America – as soon as he had left that letter of resignation on the Resolute desk. Nobody had heard from him since, not once in the long eighteen months that had passed since that day. Olivia was beginning to think nobody would ever hear from him again.

She wanted to blame him for that. Some parts of her did, sometimes. But if she blamed him fully for leaving, then she also had to blame herself for not giving him a single reason to stay, in the end.

She honestly didn’t think she’d ever see him again, after he left. Honestly, she figured she didn’t really deserve to, not after all she’d done. Jake had a lot of faults. All people did. But he’d never left because that was his choice. He’d left because he’d had to, because he’d been called away or because Olivia had forced him to go. That was one of many ways in which he and Olivia differed. When it came to her, Jake hadn’t ever been able to make himself completely leave. When it came to him, Olivia hadn’t ever been able to convince herself to stay.

She didn’t think she’d ever see him again, and she was alright with that. Well, she wasn’t alright with it, not for herself, but she figured it was best for him. She could be alright with it, if that was what was best for him. She thought she could, at least.

So, that made it even more of a surprise when he turned up on her doorstep, one afternoon in late June, looking absolutely exhausted and staring at her like she was the only source of light he’d seen in a longer time than he’d ever admit – like the mere sight of her was answer enough to every question he had ever posed.

“Hey,” he said, simply, like that was all he felt needed to be said.

Maybe it was. Maybe that was really all she _wanted_ to be said, in that moment.

“Hey,” she echoed quietly, stepping aside without any hesitation to invite him into her apartment. “You want coffee?” she asked over her shoulder, leading him down the hall to the kitchen and removing two mugs from a cabinet before he could even answer the question.

Jake studied her for a moment, then cracked a small smile as he took a seat at her kitchen bar. “Yeah,” he agreed quietly. “Coffee would be nice.”

And it was only four words, but it sounded like forgiveness. It sounded like a new beginning.


End file.
